Chains and Cages weigh us down,
Yet deep inside, we hold the key.
Look around, and you will see,
The endless state of mystery.
-
We writhe and scream,
And want to be free.
But look around, at what you see,
For all around, is mystery.
-
When you see, and see you will,
The key is there to be free.
And fly we will, and meet the sky,
And know no more, the mystery.
Yet deep inside, we hold the key.
Look around, and you will see,
The endless state of mystery.
-
We writhe and scream,
And want to be free.
But look around, at what you see,
For all around, is mystery.
-
When you see, and see you will,
The key is there to be free.
And fly we will, and meet the sky,
And know no more, the mystery.
Wow. O.O
ReplyDeleteThat's good. I've never read any of your poems before, but I have to say, I'm officially impressed. My favorite is the first stanza.
Thanks! I personally think my "Turn Back, Turn Back I Say" poem is cooler, but I guess I haven't shared that with you, yet. I'll send it via email
DeleteI can't wait!
DeleteOkay, so unfortunately I don't think I have time to interpret your poems the way you do mine, but this is amazing. I love how it kind of goes from not knowing to knowing.
ReplyDeleteLol I'm surprised that I have time to interpret your poems that way, and I have tons of free time, so I don't blame you
DeleteI think I could have done better; I was in a rush, though, because I was writing it for a friend I may have lost contact with in a matter of minutes :P
I really like it. The only issue I see is it's starts out a slightly different rhythm so it's a little inconsistent, but that could just be how I read it
DeleteOkay, I'll bear that in mind lol. This is literally the fourth poem I've written though, so I'm still a little new
DeleteOkay, I'm missing two. I've only read two, where are the others? xD
DeleteWell, the second one is actually a scrapped one. My third poem (the one on the CWC blog) was a remake of the second one. This is the fourth one, obviously. The first one, however, is arguably my best poem; it's a four-line one-stanza poem that I'll release in December sometime :)
DeleteI HAVE TO WAIT A MONTH???
DeleteI'm outraged
DeleteAnd, I don't scrap finished poems. I keep them in my notebook, but write DISCARD through them.
Well, only about 16 days-ish. December isn't a full month away
DeleteThis is great Mark, I can't believe you're new at poetry, this is amazing! :)
ReplyDeleteThanks! I got a ton of praise on the CWC blog with my poem (really just a rewritten version of my second poem), and I began to wonder if I was better at poetry than I thought; tbh, I now believe I'm a better poet than I am a novelist lol. Still, either way, I still have a TON of room for improvement, and I can't wait to learn from all my fantastic friends!
DeleteI might quit early.
ReplyDelete